“You always own the option of having no opinion. There is never any need to get worked up or to trouble your soul about things you can’t control. These things are not asking to be judged by you...

“You always own the option of having no opinion.  There is never any need to get worked up or to trouble your soul about things you can’t control.  These things are not asking to be judged by you.  Leave them alone.”  --Marcus Aurelius

Nothing drives internet clicks quite like outrage, huh?  We are constantly bombarded by bold headlines about this group is offended by this and that group is outraged about that.  It draws us in.  We instinctively want to know what could have been said or done to upset so many people this much.  Frequently, there is an entire group that is outraged at the outrage.  Name-calling and counter demonstrations commence.

Whether it’s foreign policy, a domestic issue, celebrity gossip, etc., there will almost always be two sides at war, shouting the other side down, unwilling to listen to any argument or opinion that isn’t 100% in lock-step with their own.  It’s prevalent.  It’s constant.  One could occupy all of one’s time with it, if one so chose.

I can only speak for what assists me with sobriety, but here’s my decision:  I abstain.  I don’t express a political opinion to anyone publicly.  Ever.  It’s not that I don’t have them, it’s just that I don’t find it productive to engage on the subject with anyone.  I’m also not going to be the person calling for boycotts if a company or a celebrity does or says something I don’t agree with.  If the cause it’s righteous enough for me to change my behavior, fine, but I’m not going to try and rally the troops.  It’s pointless.  It’s exhausting.  

I know this:  There’s not a person in the world I’m likely to find who is going to change their views about these subjects because of what I say or how I argue it.  So why waste my time?  More importantly, why waste my serenity?

Alcoholics and addicts, in my view, need to be especially wary of being drawn into controversies, whether online or in real life.  It’s easy for us to let our emotions get a little too amped-up and that can take us to unhealthy places.  I try to remain on an even keel and not allow myself to get overly upset because the news tells me a bunch of other people are protesting this or are angry about that.  I have only so much bandwidth and I don’t want to use it looking for reasons to be upset.  The drunk me loved that, though.  The drunk me loved to wade into controversy and drink at the mayhem.

I think that my background in AA also shaped my decision to stay out of public controversies.  AA doesn’t weigh in on any of it and I always thought that this was a smart decision.  I can’t imagine if AA were in the business of endorsing political candidates or taking positions on the issues of the day, unrelated to recovery from alcoholism.  Again, I am a person and I am entitled to an opinion.  I just don’t tend to share it or go out of my way to develop on an opinion that has absolutely nothing to do with me.  If something isn’t offensive to me, no one should be able to convince me that it is.  

I have put myself in the public space with this blog and with social media accounts, but I never get into divisive or controversial subjects, not only for this reason but also because I don’t want to alienate people who might otherwise be open to my experience, strength and hope as it relates to sobriety.  Picking sides on unrelated issues doesn’t further my primary purpose here or elsewhere of being of maximum service to my fellows, so I avoid it as best I can.

It’s election season in the U.S. and things are certainly heating up.  It can be difficult to refrain from arguing with someone’s post if you don’t agree.  But, perhaps give it a try.  Scroll past.  Move on?  Have you really been hurt?  What can you possibly gain by engaging?  Your sobriety is more important than a petty online argument.  Maintain that focus.  Try to remember that the things that unite us can be more powerful than the things that divide us.  Look for similarities with your fellow humans.  You’ll find many.  Dear Reader, I hope you’ll not sacrifice the joy of your sobriety for the temptation of being drawn into unnecessary controversy.